mirpof

Friday. There he is, approaching 40 and preaching about what's in his name. Time. We are all bounded by the most magical matter of all. Time. It's the witness of faults and truths, the evidence that proves. Time. It changes you, changes me, changes us. Time. Time. it's magical, mysterious and sacred, controlled only by the Greatest Power. Allah S.W.T. no matter what year or age. all that I want is to be a better person. Ameen. and I thank Allah for having someone I can always look up to. Happy Birthday brother. (though I know, not so much of your thing wishing birthday and all..hee)

If Claudia Ghandi ended up having a garden which she could walk on forever, which in reality she never does since she'd be dead before 'forever'... I prolly already have my own several botanical gardens that supply all sorts of flowers all over the world which is abundantly profiting by it's continuous production all year round. I could be so rich that my wealth would be a great privilege to my great great great grandson, if it'd somehow properly managed by his father who'd potentially turn out to be the son of my son's son.  Sadly, regardless whoever crosses my mind or frankly speaking 'I think about'... my brain doesn't seem to produce any flower, neither that my mum's orchids seem to bloom. all that I got is some sort of mutated brain cells which I can't quite figure out what sort of mutant they are since I didn't do biology when I was in high school. Anyway, I did like Cyclops in X-men albeit, Wolverine is still the coolest of th...

Sebuah kapal terbang baru saja melewati langit pagi yang tenang di perkampungan Mengkuang. Terbangnya teramatlah rendah, boleh kata lebih kurang 40 meter dari paras bumi. Menurut si Talhah yang obses dengan kapal terbang semenjak kecilnya (skrg bawa lari kamera aku menunggu jika kapal terbang itu lintas lagi), jenis kapal terbang tersebut ialah F/A-18 Hornet. tak tahulah boleh percaya atau tak budak tu. Malaysia dahla ada 8 buah saja jet tu, apa benda dia nak buat dekat sini.... oh, tapi berdekatan Teluk Air Tawar memang ada lapangan latihan tentera udara.  F/A 18Ds Hornet Teringat, kecil-kecil dulu selalu la jugak perasan kapal terbang terbang rendah, berlatih agaknya... tapi rendah sungguh terbangnya tadi... bak kata Dihyah 'bihsiinnnggg '. Getus hatiku pula "patut saman ja depa ni, mengganggu ketenteraman awam sungguh, terkejut kot tadi. Kalau ada baby tengah lena, mesti jaga" Namun, sejenak, ditamu pulak sekelumit rasa ngeri di sudut hati. Terbayang mereka ...

It's a part of our fitrah that we are drawn to beautiful objects/sights. in fact, Allah is beautiful and He loves beauty. It's a part of being women, that we want to be pretty, wear fashionable clothes, have healthy skin, put on pretty make ups and have a great body. I'm not so much into high-ends fashion and stuff, do mix and match all the times rather than trying to keep up with the trend, pretty ignorant sometimes... but I believe I have sound judgement when it comes to physical appearance, that includes, what-you-wear... I refuse to say 'fashion' as I said, I'm rather ignorant. I always feel like it's an honor when people ask for my opinion about what they are wearing. Almost every member in the family does that once in while. I also give out opinion even when they don't ask, and they always welcome my views with open arms which makes me feel so happy and appreciated. I may not be that stylish or fashionable myself, but I always try my best not...

Just got back from Teluk Bahang, left my shoe there, hoping a mermaid prince will find it, pick it up and come to find me. It would be nice to live underwater as a mermaid. ho yeah, I still believe in fairy tale. boo hooo... kidding. not that stupid yo. haha. I believe we are responsible for our own happiness as much as I believe Cinderella purposely left her glass shoe. Things don't work the same for everyone though.  What about, have a little faith and follow your heart? and always, always.... always remember, Allah knows best. =)

it's a continuous struggle... 

Kadang-kadang bila tgk cerita org miskin, ala-ala bersama mu… kesian pun ada, menyampah pun ada. Bukan nak belagak, saya bukan org kaya, budak kampong hidup sederhana, skrg hidup pun mengharapkan org tua… belum ada kerjaya yang sempurna. Cuma terlalu byk juga cerita yg kedengaran dan reality yang kelihatan membuka mata dan minda. Malang. Sesetengah manusia diuji dgn kemiskinan. Rumah buruk. Duit tak ada. Tapi yg aku peliknya, kadangnya miskin, lepas itu tak ada pekerjaan. Ok. Tak kerja langsung. Duduk nganga mengharap ehsan manusia, anak-anak tak mampu disekolahkan. Ada yang kelahiran tak mampu didaftarkan. Kalau dah tak ada kelulusan utk kerja kerajaan, usahalah kearah lain. Duduknya di kampong, ambillah upah cuci rumah ka, tak pun tanamlah sayur, belalah ayam ka… buat lah kuih jual. Jgn la duduk goyang kaki buat muka sedih dekat pintu saja. Masalahnya diaorg ni bukan cacat atau kurang upaya. Kaki tangan sempurna. Haish, tak faham. Kotor. Ada suatu kawasan ni di negeri utara tanah a...

I get a free hug almost everyday. I get a hug from a cute little girl who likes to say 'alaa tomei tomei tomei' when she watches Garfield. This girl can stay up until 2-3 am in the morning watching cartoon... drinking cold ice tea and eating bahulu. Her dad called her Garfield for always lazing around, watching tv. She speaks American english, but very lazy to read. She cries if you forced her to study, albeit getting no. 1 in her class. She is also lazy to speak.  If you asked her too much, she'll say 'I don't knowwww... ' until you force her to answer....  then she'll say something, which always begin with 'oh yeah, I remember' What a weird little niece I have... living in her own small world. Ibtihal.

Kaklong: Adik, jom kita pi Pulau Aman. Me: Nak buat apa pi tengok polis? OK. saya konfius. yang tu Bukit Aman. Pulau Aman is actually one of the mini islands around Penang. Yes. I never knew that. I think, there's a feri named after it... but how would I ever know it's existence?  photo taken from here I do know some other small islands around here like Pulau Jerejak and... and... and... ok. failed.  Nephew: Makcik, baba ajak p Sedim Me: Malas laa.. nak buat apa. Mak, depa nak p Sedim buat apa? Mak: Tgk tanah. Brother: Siap! cepat Me: OK la. Bila semua orang dah siap.  Me: Eh?! Awat semua orang pakai mcm nak p jogging ja? Nephew: Yala, nak mandi ayaq terjun, makcik taktau ka? Me: hmmph! (cepat2 grab another shirt and pants) Brother: Mai ayaq terjun pakai punya raget Me: fine, next time org bawak pelampung.  fuh, tgk budak zaman skrg... ke air terjun mcm ke kolam renang. siap pakai goggles. mainan pantai. heh...  haih... dah besar2 dah anak me...

I wish to be a TV presenter.  A childhood dream that never dies, probably will never happen too.

"laaa, bila balik ni....?" "awat nampak seghoh (semakin kurus) sangat? tinggai haluih (halus = kecil) hang duk sana?" "brapa taun lg? ni kak Ra (bukan nama sebenar) kat Mesir lg 6 taun" "nanti ajak tok p rumah" (referring to my mum) 1. I come to realize that whenever people ask 'when did you come back?' my standard answer would always be, 'few weeks ago'... 2. A few people has noted that I've grown thinner in some ways. That includes my dad n brother. Apparently, not eating properly throughout this year has taken it's toll on me. 3. Judging from my physical appearance, people always think I'm younger than my age. I suppose, it's not so bad if you're in your 40s... in fact, it's something I wish would happen when I grow old.  However, to be mistakenly thought as a high school student when you are at your best age of adulthood is so not cool. I wonder if this would be a problem in getting a job in the fut...

 Happy Eid!  Commonly, Malaysian Eid celebration wouldn't be complete without ketupat.. so this time around, I'm gonna show you how to wrap a Ketupat Palas (sticky rice dumpling)...  Frankly speaking I'm not a good cook (I should say, not yet), but wrapping ketupat palas is something I can proudly teach anyone. hahaha...  Though it might seem kinda easy, if you fold the leaf to the wrong direction, your ketupat might end up as 'ketupat betina' (female? ketupat)... oh well, how do I explain this, its rather perverse to put a photo or explain... well, doesn't matter... here's the steps of how to wrap a sticky rice ketupat. 1. Fold the wide edge of the leave into a cone shape container 2. Fill it with the half-cooked sticky rice (the rice was cooked with cocunut milk, a few pandan leaves and salt) 3. Fold the tail of the leaf to the left, covering the rice 4. ok, this is a tricky part... and my nephew didn't take the photo properly... hai...

2 very close relatives (an uncle and cousin) passed away last year. Yesterday, a neighbor’s grandson involved in an accident, and died. Last few months, a cousin’s house was caught fire, his wife was severely injured and breathed her last after few days in ICU My friend was 19 and he was killed in a road accident when I was 18. Another friend… a year younger, passed away of a lung cancer. A neighbor whom I don’t remember his name died last month. We all will eventually die, it’s just the matter of when… and normally whenever the thought of dying visits, it comes with that lame rhetorical question which often left unanswered… Are you ready? constantly reminded, yet continuously forgetting.... Me!

At times, you wonder about your own behavior… but when you’re back to where you came from… you know that there is nothing weird about the way you are…and if it’s in the blood, changing it would be a lifelong dream. Apparently, no one loves snide remarks. Especially when it’s thrown just in your face… funny jokes that ain’t funny… laughter and giggles that crawl into you like poisonous bugs, ripping your flesh of the bones. But hey, sarcasm works wonders when nothing else matters…. And very often, it leaves you something to live with… something like a derogatory remark about yourself… hahaa… aside from trust, self-confidence is very expensive. …and many times in my life, I could barely tell the difference between vices and virtues… I am forever small, looking up to all the great people around me. Life is good.

This is my last semester project (Semester 01, 2010) I've been wanting to put this on the blog since it was presented which is about 5 months ago.... but soooooo lazy to adjust and write... and now, I end up chucking in just my speech.   The Blurred Masterplan The project is a metaphor of Melbourne city. It is generated by the blur master plan or a blistered satellite view of Melbourne city and its surroundings. The blur master plan is a reverse representation of a typical master plan which is meant to give a different perception about Melbourne city. It represents the fuzziness of Melbourne City, its history, urban life and memories. The reading of the master plan which has been visually interpreted by the idea of distance between the dots hence becomes the rule to generate the form of the building. The rule is explored through three main strategies that response to Venturi’s Complexity and Contradiction.  Firstly, the project celebrates the interdependency between form an...

Yay! Changed my blog layout. I’ve grown sick of dark and gloomy background… besides, it’s spring yo! Flowers are blooming everywhere and the sun shines even on the rainy days, why must I all be sad and moody. Let’s get the mood brightened up a bit.   Anyway, for some reasons the blog header appears to be a bit pixelated, I don’t know why. I’m pretty sure I got the dimension correct, I’ve checked the pixels and all. Anyway, it was way worse when I uploaded the JPEG version, so I tried using PNG and it seems a little bit better, like the above. I’ve been changing my blog name a couple of times till now. I think, from now on… I shall try to stick with one. I'll use mirpof. Where did I get it from? Oh, it was a typo when I wanted to write…...... heheee… I’ll keep that to myself. But yeah, that was when I first setup this blog… the url accidentally became mirpof.blogspot.com. It really has no meaning. Unless you can find one for me. Lalaalaa…. nak balik Malaysia lagi 6 hari, ...

I looked up in they sky and asked, what are you after, Kiambang? The Braided Campus, Formfield Design Studio Sem 02, 2010

Spring brings along sunshine. Days are a lot warmer than in winter, of course… and it’s a relief to those who suffer from cold winter weather. Yet to be honest, I’m not a big fan of spring… (I blogged before how always prefer autumn out all seasons). Especially during the early spring, flying pollens gives me allergy. Also, the-never stable-spring temperature affects my skin badly. I woke up this morning with a roommate asking ‘what happened to your face?’ my face redden occasionally, not the shimmering blush red, but the horrible irritated red. Ah, I don’t know how to describe. I’ve been applying bio oil hoping that it’ll ease the irritation. Anyone has any idea what else can I do? Nevertheless, I love spring for one thing… flowers are cheap. It’s the season, right. Oh, I’ve been unfair to mother nature, I hate pollens but love blossoming flowers… sorry… And it’s one of the best thing about living here; the availability of fresh cut flowers. Well, gardening is never my forte (aaaa, ...

I was too busy with architecture for the last few weeks.. . haven’t really got a chance to get my head around what’s going on in the world, especially back home in Malaysia. I felt detached from reality. I felt like I was living in ignorance. I felt guilty. Therefore, since I finished my final presentation yesterday (still got 2 submissions coming though)… Today, I decided to take a day off from architecture. I went out for a good lunch with a friend, had some retail therapy… and came back, get on the internet and try to update myself with some of the current issues. I read. I read. I read and I read. As a result. I feel sick. And I still feel guilty, way worse… I feel guilty and hopeless for knowing things I could never really do anything about. I know... I know...I know I’m a little behind. But I still need to put more efforts in understanding the following issues, I’m feeling lost and mentally constipated just by reading one or two news/articles/blogposts about them. 1. ...

Tomorrow is the final presentation for design studio this semester. Insha’Allah, if I manage to breeze through this one, I’ll be left with one more upper pool studio (next semester)…. followed by the major project (final semester). Hence, I’m done here, Insha’Allah. Either I’ll go back for good or not, that’s a different story. But of course, I don’t want to contribute to the current brain drain. Let’s see what my master degree can do for the country, Insha’Allah. Subhanallah, time does fly like an arrow. It’s hard to believe that I’ll be in my final year here next year. Oh my, I’m feeling old. 23?! Next year, 24? (kalau hidup lagi la)… 25, 26, 27…. Tuaaanyaaaa…… and one day, if I live long enough, I'll wake up with with wrinkles and grey hair. It feels like I just set my foot here, yesterday. Lameeee. Haha… and that’s a lie. To be honest, I feel rotten for being here for so long… if I were to further my study, I’ll definitely look for some other place. I love Melbourne, st...

Laughter is indeed a good medicine. I’ve been watching The Big Bang Theory while doing design, as I always need a good company, especially when I’m building my 3D model. I finished the whole episodes of season one, my model is progressing quite well and… I feel happy. =) I guess I need to go to bed early tonight since I got a plan tomorrow. So, as what Sheldon would always say… Good night. And if there's an apocalypse, good luck. Daa!

I wish to make you laugh... laugh like you used to do... hence you would love...  love like you wanted to.

Oh... seperti seorang ibu melihat anak-anaknya membesar... girangnya hati melihat tulip-tulip ku berkembang segar dan mekar... ah, sudahlah... drama! but they are really pretty, aren't they? dan dah terlebih-lebih kembang pun.... sukanyaaaa! ^.^ lepas tu, ada satu kuntum tu mcm aiskrim... ni yang main petik tak tahu spesies tu... sekali ada yang unik ni... rasa macam warna putih lagi cantik, tp sbb dia unik, lalu dia menarik perhatian... do people dry tulips? I tried drying roses before and they look pretty good... maybe should try with tulips... ngehee... I don't mind living in a room full of flowers... dried or fresh.... they make me happy... btw, I'm loving this retro/lomo camera apps on iPhone.... who needs a lomo when you have an iPhone... hahaaa! hmph! but I still want a polaroid.... maybe I should buy one before going back for this summer holiday... my nephew Talhah must be very excited about that... OK... buat kerja, nanti nak pasang cenderahati ut...

The good thing about having a close friend who happens to be in the same situation as yours is you can open up to each other and talk about it like you both are reading the same page of a story book. Anyway, we girls open up to each other most of the time. ******** Girls dream. Most of us grew up reading fairy tales, in which wedding is always the happy ending… a prince will do everything while the princess just has to lay somewhere sleeping, combing her hair, eating poisoned apple or cleaning a stepmother house. Even in Malay folklore, the girl will always be someone who is innocent, naïve, bullied, born with a fish, has a veggie name, and kind, well stupidly kind and beautiful. So we grew up dreaming… hoping, eventually at the end of the day… a prince or a gentleman will come knocking on our door… after fighting dragons and all sort of strange creatures, sweep we off our feet… marry us and live happily ever after. Women understood. Most of us are not princesses. We were not...

I wish someone would write me a letter, a deep and moving letter. haha! ok...that's a bit random. 

I hate uncertainties in so many ways. It always leaves me in a difficult situation which will hinder me from taking any progressive steps. As much as I love design subject, it always puts me in this situation in which I have to choose between doing either what I really like to do or what my tutor wants me to do. Maybe it seems like I should always listen to my tutor, but when you come to something subjective like design, doing what your tutor wants you to do is not always good enough... she will expect more, to an expense of you do what you want, however that may not please her because what you want always contradicts what your tutor wants. People understand things differently; a thing about being a designer is you must be transparent enough to allow people to read your mind, but to some people... regardless how transparent you are they won’t just see through you because they are mentally blocked by their own existing perception. So you have to talk through your ideas, peel it car...

A friend tweeted “esok dah Oktober!” It occurred to me how quickly time passes. Life seems to flow monotonously, but along the way, as I took a glimpse of a few recent weeks, many things had actually took place and some of them, leaved without a trace for me to understand what it was, let alone response… but at the back of my mind… I knew it happened, and I remember. July It was one of the sweetest months. I went home, had a good winter escape in my hometown… and I met you. However, I stumbled upon a door sill and realized, the door was left ajar because the lock wasn't working! (haha... mesti orang tak faham) … huhu.. The semester commenced... it was a good start. I got my first choice studio. However, at the end of the month.. things started to get a little hay wired. August I would say, patience was the hallmark of August. The semester got tougher. Works were continuously piling up… things got off my hands. I romped about my life, breaking all the good things I had… I h...

I’ve been wanting to write about this for so long. Now that my brain is figuring out some stuffs about design, I’ll write about it… as I said in previous post, I’m a multitasker…hihii Before I proceed, I better clarify that, I’m not writing a fiqh article.. I’m just sharing my thoughts with all the hijabees out there, something based on my observations… Hijabess aren’t really strangers here in Melbourne, you’ll see women with headscarves everywhere. Nevertheless, from my personal experiences, people still question about this piece of fabric wrapping our head… some of the lame questions are like, why do you wear it? Can you ever take it off? Do you wear it at home? Can you wear different colors? How do you get your hair cut? Well, I’m not answering all of those question here… but I’m going to write about something else.. here is the story. I know that scholars differ in the ruling of not wearing hijjab with the non-muslim women… you can ask about it yourself and I’m not compete...

As soon as you started talking to people about your situation or anything that’s burdening you. You’ll realize you’re not alone. God created each of us unique but at the same times have so much in common so that we could learn from one another. I’m not a big fan of generalization for I never see two situations as equal. There is no one size for everything. But I do believe as much as we think others don’t understand us, they do have things in their mind that could relate to what is in ours… and as much as I don’t fancy generalization, I use it all the times just because it makes sense to many people rather than just myself. It won’t be me not having so much thoughts mounting in head. I always try to focus on doing one thing at a time, but it’s just as hard as trying to quit being a nocturnal…what I’m saying, it’s not impossible.. It’s just so freaking hard. If my head is not a mess, it prolly got nothing in. I’m a multitasker… instead of keeping on complaining why can’t I focus bl...

What a life would’ve been without twitter or facebook or even this blog. Writing has been my salvation since I know how to write. Seriously, I don’t really remember how it all started but all that I knew, I kept diaries since I was in primary school. I composed poetries when I was ten and enjoy reading since kindergarten. I don’t really write for people to read. I write for my own personal reasons, I write to divert my negative energy into something less destructive. Written words can’t be harmful if they were left unread. .. that’s why diaries have always been my best friends. Technology somehow has changed that. I don’t want to talk about how people these days have split personalities between their real and virtual life. Most thoughts are read, at least by a few… and with the mushrooming social platforms, people talk more, in fact more than in their actual life… and I talk more than I used to do, sometimes to an extent of disclosing unnecessary personal stuffs. <-like sayin...

Aku mahu... teramat mahu pergi jauh... tempat yang teramat jauh, kalau nak sampai itu jenuh. Kalau dicari lelah bersepuh... jauhhhhhh sekali... tak tercapai naluri... padan muka, siapa pun tak dapat cari... separuh mimpi separuh realiti... Tapi.... Kerja belambak, duit takdak. Di sinilah duduk tercanggak. Sedih. "Hei kamu, bawa aku pergi dari sini... kerna dalam hati ini, ada secangkir benci yang aku musuhi.... jua ada setelaga cinta yang aku hampir lupa" OK... tak payah mengerti.... hanya momok perempuan gila di malam hari. ....dan aku pun ketawa berdekah-dekah pada diri. ya, padan muka sendiri.

Got stuck between works and did this random  psychology test ... look at the result! You Are An INFP (introversion, intuition, feeling, perception) is an abbreviation used in the publications of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) to refer to one of sixteen personality types.[1] The MBTI was developed from the work of prominent psychiatrist Carl G. Jung in his book Psychological Types. Jung proposed a psychological typology based on the theories of cognitive functions that he developed through his clinical observations.) - copied fr wikipedia The Idealist - O.o You are a creative person with a great imagination. *wink* You enjoy living in your own inner world. (huh! are saying I'm a 4D person?) Open minded and accepting, you strive for harmony in your important relationships. *chiuuwwww!!*** It takes a long time for people to get to know you. (oh welll...*caugh*) You are hesitant to let people get close to you. But once you care for someone, you do ev...

Sometimes, you don’t really want to hear things like ‘you’ll be alright’… because it’s all that you’ve been telling yourself all along… the word ‘alright’ seems to appear so pretentious and sarcastic… and you don't know how long it’ll take to get there. Sometimes, you do need someone to remind you that you are better than what you think of yourself and trust in you more than you trust in yourself. Sometimes, a slap on the face is way better than a comforting hug… you need someone who always brave enough to snap you of your broken dreams … wake you up to move on and fix things… or at least, dream another dream. Sometimes, being overly optimistic would only give you false hope… you need to step back, admit the impediment… measure your strength properly prior to taking any action. Sometimes, you do need someone to catch you when you fall… but if you think of yourself as a bouncy ball rather than a fragile glass… you would prefer a hard surface rather than a soft one. Sometim...

I have so much random thoughts in my head… well, I’m desperately in need of something useful for my design.. but all of this randomness is hindering my brain from working properly… adoila… *I promptly named a friend Mahmud for no reason today* The coming mid semester crit chills me to the bone. I’m doing such a studio which I kinda like very much despite the crazy hectic workloads… really wanna give all my best… besides… my ex will be coming as one of the guest crits… opps! I mean, my ex-tutor… muahaha.. *haish, merepek sgt aih ckp!!!* Have a snippet of my preliminary design proposal: my tutor said it's 'beautifully ugly' *hmmph!* or in master chef term ' yuckyyumm' Haish… I feel like a hopeless lazy bum… blame it on the raya mode! Oh! Ask me not about my raya… it was good all in all, alhamdulillah… but how could I ever be celebrating much when all these worries are having its own celebration in my head…. Syyyhhh.. do you hear it? Chiiiuwwww chiuuwwww chi...