Apparently this blog still exist.
Apparently I haven't been writing here for a very long time.
Apparently life is so much different now.
Apparently I'm not always keen to share it with the world anymore.
Apparently I'm just too busy or, is it too lazy.
Writing is good though.
I should be back.
I will be back.
There are things, not very interesting things,
but worth sharing, if not with the world, at least, with my future self...
I will be back.
Wednesday, August 10, 2016
Monday, August 18, 2014
So we went to the baby fair, oh did I ever mention here that we're expecting.
Alhamdulillah, the baby is due on this Raya Haji, inshaAllah. You'll see a mini me soon. I still can't imagine mothering a child, but we are excited and scared at the same time. May Allah ease it all for us, amen.
Back on the baby fair, we met this pak cik who promoted some sort of 'advise' on child education, he's selling some programme I believe, though I don't quite remember what it is.
All that I could recall he was saying something about every child is born a genius. But only 3% become geniuses, while the rest .. uhm... become 'de-genius-ed' at the age of 3 by the environment or education that we put them in. How true? I don't know and I doubt it. How do you measure a newborn genius-ness? My husband, he wore the best skeptical look in the entire crowd.
Anyways, true enough, that environment has a massive impact on a person characteristic, that includes his intelligence. But what makes you a genius isn't always how clever you are when you were a baby, at school or even in university, its always the achievement. Sometimes, a person can be so outstanding at a certain phase of life, he could be the one who seems to have the brightest ideas among the peers, could give the most eloquent speech in any topic discussed, could solve the hardest mathematical equation you've ever encountered... but at the end of the day, no one recognizes him as genius, unless he did something that wins the world attention, or have an achievement that people would remember. Well, you could have the prettiest dress in the world but if no one ever seen you put it on, no one would know about it, or recognize the beauty of the dress. On that note,
some most of the geniuses we know were only known as geniuses after they died.
.Oh, and the pakcik did say a few other things; like Don't teach your kids ABC and let them watch Noddy
All and all, it's fun to think I'm carrying a genius, maybe it's true that every baby is a genius, because the one inside of me seems to be running some sort of experiment daily inside with little explosion here and there.
Baby, please take care of mummy's laboratory.
Wednesday, April 16, 2014
We are not created similar to each other. The malay proverb says, rambut sama hitam, hati lain-lain. You might come from the same root, breathe the same air, eat the same food, wear the same cloth or even sleep on the same bed, but no matter how much we share and we care for each other in this world, in some circumstances we would differ from one another.
Being married taught me that you could love someone so so much that you would give your life to him, but sometimes, you would still have a different opinion from your love one. Different opinion, different preference, different way of doing things and solving an equation. You could be so similar to your spouse in the way that you always pointing at the same bird and smiling at the same rainbow when you both look up to the sky but the moment you lay your eyes to the ocean, the ocean seems bluer in your eyes but greener in his. The remote island at a far-far away of the horizon seems like a mystical creature that make up your imagination of a mythical story, but to him, it looks like a potential place for a new tourism palace.
And it happens, all the time, sometimes we contest one another, who's opinion is better, why am I right and you are wrong, sometimes we fight to prove our self, sometimes you have to lift the other person higher or bring him lower to your eye level so he could understand why are you seeing a different color, that perspective matters, sometimes we have to settle in the middle in which neither of us really satisfy, but we let it go, because we love. And love rules above all the differences. Love concurs.
You know, I think we can actually build a park with all the mystic creatures at that island, it could be part of the tourist attraction at that far-far away island. :)
Tuesday, April 15, 2014
Some people like to tell stories, although most of the time the story that they tell is a mere retelling. Some like to write, stories that derive from their experience of maybe pure imagination. Anyhow, I admire people who can write or tell or write and tell stories wonderfully. My husband for example is a good writer, in a sense that he writes, although I might not fancy all of his writings and most of his stories are all unfinished, oh let me rephrase that, 'are yet to finish', I find him wonderful as a writer because he always manage to put his imagination into words beautifully. He manages to bring people into the realm of his imagination. I see myself as an imaginative person as well, I imagine all sort of things that you people don't want to know, yet I do not have the ability to always talk my imagination out, let alone write them and maybe or sadly the fact is most of the times I am just plain lazy. eheh. Sometimes, my husband talks about the stuff that he wants to write, or the next episodes of his unfinished novel.. he could go on and on like it's all stamped inside his mind, like all the imagination is vividly alive inside his head. For example, when he talks about a place in the story, it sounds like there's already a city or village depending on the story built inside his head with all sort of tiny people (characters in the story) living inside. I wish I could peep into his mind, but I don't know if I could live with the aftershock. haha. Anyway, I pray that one day at least one of his stories will be published.
I also know someone who can tell stories attractively. Yes, I use the word attractive, because when he tells stories, I want to just listen, no matter what it is about. It attracts me, and that person is my brother. He has a talent of telling story in a way that it sounds very interesting. The stories could be so serious like the stories from the time of the prophets or merely a ridiculous made up or a long joke that at the end is not so funny, but I always want to listen to him. He is a charmer in a way. eh, why am I complimenting my brother that much. But yeah, if you are one of those who have a story telling talent, you should be very grateful and make use of your talent wisely because these days, at the era where everyone's attention seems glued to their smart phone, it is very hard to get people to pay attention to you.
All in all, I believe that when it comes to retelling a story, you should make clear of yourself and to your audiences or listeners the source of the story. I am a skeptic person and I have trust issues. Therefore, should anyone bring me stories, I'm always asking 'who told you?' 'where the stories came from?' 'how do you know it's true?' (if the person claims it to be real/factual). It should be habitual to a person who speaks to the public to clarify the authenticity of a story he's telling, or else, he might be telling a lie. If you're not sure about the authenticity, don't talk about it. It is sad these days to hear a significant figure telling lies through stories that's intended to give lessons. For example; I recently heard a a story from an 'ustaz' of a man who went to communicate to his trustworthy dead friend to ask for his money. The man was told to go to two wells, one is in Makkah and the other in Yaman, and call the dead friend name and if answered in the well in Makkah the friend is in heaven but if answered upon calls at the well of Yaman, the friend is in hell. The dead friend turned out to be in the second well, meaning he's in hell although he was kind and trustworthy through out his life. The man had a conversation with his dead friend at the well and he told that no matter how trustworthy he was, he's punished for ignoring the charity to his kindred. I believe the story has a good intention. But but but... you're not suppose to tell a ridiculous lies especially when it relates to the religion. To me, the story scantly sounds logical to a sound mind that one could know the fate of a soul by simple calling his name at a well. I find it ridiculous. Don't you.
Sadly, in this world, not everyone thinks the way you do. Not everyone knows when to be judgmental. Not everyone think through everything they heard and question the validity of the information. Some people take things at face value, some people cannot differentiate fact and fiction.
So people, before you tell, think.
Wednesday, April 2, 2014
It rains a lot this few days, alhamdulillah. But I read on the star online that the government will continue with cloud seeding because the water volume in dams in the Klang Valley is yet back at safe level.
Anyway, I read up a bit on cloud seeding and how its done.In a laymen term, what I understood is the operation is basically to spray some chemicals commonly used (silver iodide or dry carbon dioxide) onto the selected clouds.. The chemical will then vaporize with the existing droplets in the cloud or on its own depending on the type of chemical used... and induce rain.
I wonder to what extent does cloud seeding is dangerous for health and how much it costs for every operation and why are we not focusing on the haze issue at its core or global warming in general and bigger course instead of resorting to such a temporary solution. Need to do more reading.
Oh yeah, heard that the petrol price Ron 95 will increase again tonight. Third time since I moved here a year ago. Haish.
Tuesday, April 1, 2014
I posted this photo on instagram, but I had to put it up here as well, because it's just plain beautiful and I want to remember it. On days when I had some extra time to read my old post, I wish to come across this photo and look at it and smile, the way it makes me smile today.
That's my ayah and his friends in the photo.Ayah is in green baju melayu and white ketayap . If you know my dad, he is not all cuddly and affectionate. I meant with hugs and kisses, unlike mum, I think mums in general like to smooch her kids. Its normal for dad to show a rather stoical characteristic.
Anyways, I guess other than wisdom, aging also brings up the tender side of a person. Back to the photo, it was taken on my wedding day. My ayah is hugging his friends, that's a real brotherly hug, you can sense sincerity by just looking at the picture.. it's so beautiful... a friend said it's cute and I have to agree. It is cute. But I guess if anyone should ask me, how do you define ukhwah in 30 seconds, I'll show him this picture.
It's good to see ayah smile like that. :)
Monday, March 17, 2014
I remember how he sat so calm in front of my dad, I had no idea if his smiles was a covering act or his palms were all sweat, but to me, on that day, he looked like the handsomest man on this planet..
His voice echoed, still lingers at the back of my head, when he answered to my dad, the aqad. He kept it simple, but I knew, we knew for the better part of the deen is now complete. We knew, that a love is now sealed in the name of God, blessed by the wali, celebrated by family and friends with prayers and good wishes.
It was still vivid, the way he, for the first time, touched my hand and held them, subtle but firm. I remember, part of my fingers were scalded through the jitters of the wait, the henna couldn't help the concealing job, not quite a scar but I did find the marks debilitating. He understood. He placed his thumbs upon the mark while he put a ring on my fourth finger. Isn't him sweet? I was falling in love with him already.
The first touch were electrifying. It felt so right, the rightest righteous kind of act. Oh, I'm at a lost for words describe how beautiful the moment was. We held hands through and through.. and on that day, we promised each other that we shall strive to walk this life hand in hand towards the door of jannah. Amen.