Friday, February 26, 2010

Bersangka Baiklah Wahai Hati

Sedap angin petang ini... tengah hari tadi panas...

Macam ni lah manusia, bila panas bising panas, sana sini pasang kipas... yang jenis tak pakai baju semuanya lepas, nasib laa dah duduk negeri mcm ni, syukur la juga jadi perempuan... bukan la nak kata org perempuan tak payah jaga pandangan, tapi orang laki lagi susah rasanya... 

Bila sejuk bising sejuk, bising letrik mahal la... nak ke tandas malas... berkelubung sepanjang masa... lepas tu asyik mandi air panas, kulit rosak... muka merah macam kena rebus...

"there is always something wrong" 

I bet anyone who went to the upper pool balloting last Tuesday would still remember Peter Corrigan's story... haha... malas nak cerita.. tp itu lah... manusia kan... ada saja tak kena....

I would say that, human eyes always fail to see perfection... Allah has perfectly designed everything for us... all the nikmah before us, has been beautifully presented... but we tend to overlook, then forget... then complain... haish,.. O'Lord.. am I one of those ungrateful people?

I remember my nephew, Ammar...

One day, my kaklong lectured to her kids about school and all... just that common mom-to-kids talk, I guess... then, just about a few hours later... Ammar (his son) came to her...

Ammar: Ummi, Ammar minta maaf na...
Ummi: Sebab apa pulak ni minta maaf?
Ammar: Sebab hati Ammar kata org tua ni banyak beletiaq la.. 


Hahaha.. it was a little funny when I first heard of it... but when I reflected on the situation, he was actually apologizing for his hidden thought (which was eventually blurted out since my sister had asked about it)... 

It occurred to me that there is always some sort of thoughts in our head or heart that are not supposed to be revealed... Yes, people said..it's good to be outspoken... moreover, it's a democratic era peeps! we have freedom of speech! blablabla... but hey.. u see... a heart is never free from being hurt...

Nevertheless, however we feel... Allah knows... any single thought that we keep hidden in our deepest heart, He knows... and, how frequent do we ask for forgiveness, istighfar and all... Yes, I'm asking myself too... 

Sometimes, when calamities strike... we unconciously blame Allah for it... for instance,

"kenapa la aku... kenapa mesti aku ni huduh sangat... kenapa tuhan buat kat aku mcm ni"

Selalunya, itu hanyalah sekadar keluhan melepas lelah di dada... tapi kita seolah-olah mempersoalkan takdir...

Mak selalu pesan... "Jangan bersangka buruk dengan tuhan"... Siapa tahu, entah-entah kalau kita cantik, kita sombong, dok pi tayang kat org... takpun tulis blog dok cerita tentang kecantikan diri... hahaha... takpun nanti ramai pulak org kagum... lepas tu menimbulkan riak di hati...

So, there is a hidden reason for everything... kalau org tu tak cantik, mungkin dia baik... takpun cerdik... eh, dah bab lain pula...

Cumanya... kita jangan la bersangka buruk pada tuhan dan jgn putus harap... lepas tu, hati tu, kalau tiba-tiba terdetik benda tak baik tu.. byk-byk la istighfar... kan? kawan-kawan?

Jadi.... kiambang oi... bersangka baiklah, tak lama lagi dapat la rumah tu inshaAllah.. :)

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Weeeeee~



Oh yeah... I'm still homeless... and my precious-recently-renewed passport is still missing... rasa lempaq kok jalan dah, sapa jumpa tlg bagi (I do feel like the most careless person on earth)...haish... for some silly condition, my phone has been barred, untill next Tuesday I think... kalau mesej tak berbalas, atau kalau ada sapa2 yang melanggan mesej tapi tak dapat, minta maaf la naa....

My sky is a little gloomy in the midst hot summer day...

But hey... didn't I say in my previous post "life shouldn't be so melancholy?"

So this evening, I went out cycling with my dearest friend, cik kemboja... weee... trying my new self-assembled bike... Syok ooo ronda-ronda.... lepas tu pergi tengok Ali... haha  <- sila rujuk cik kemboja untuk keterangan lanjut...

Weee... even the sky is falling down, there are still many reasons to keep on smiling... and living... yeah!


Thursday, February 18, 2010

SMILE

Hi, my name is As. My full name is Assalamualaikum…

I’m feeling a little miserable at the moment…

But I guess…

What a boring life would it be without a little test?!

How forgetful as a servant would I be if He did not remind me of how much I always need Him… In joy and sorrow… There is He, to turn to…

This is life… sometimes, all the bad visits in abundance… little problems… sum up into a great test… but hey, Allah burdens not any soul beyond its capacity…  the greater the test, the stronger I am.. yay!

And never forget… blessings also come in abundance… I might be poor, homeless, a little ill... but I can still feed myself, I have friends’ home to take shelter, I’m breathing clean air, I have nice clothes to wear, I have many good friends by my side, I have a little brain that is still working… My, how countless is the blessing… and all in all, I have handful of love to give and to receive…

MashaAllah… It’s a beautiful life indeed…

A little encouragement… KIAMBANG IS AN OPTIMIST!!! WOOOT WOOOT!!!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Ranting about dadidadamdam...

I wished to write about my homelessness… and my heart that misses all the good I left back at home… and all the love across the oceans… then I realize that InshaAllah, sooner or later, I’ll find a house, all I need is just to keep on searching and praying... and a missing heart will not recover until the reunion… and the distance only matters to the mind not to the heart… therefore, I decide to drop the subjects… life shouldn’t be so melancholy… let’s talk about something else… something more general… something not about me…

I recently read an interesting post titled “Hargailah kewujudan suami anda” Yes, this is what I meant by something not about me… Owh, wait… maybe, something-not-YET about me… ok, that sounds more appropriate… hehe..

I’m not going to review the post… click the link and read at your own risk, no I mean for your own good whether you are married, single or divorced…

“Wuuu… interested bout this sort of thing, huh? Ada apa-apa ka? “

Haa… spekulasi! Ketuk ketampi lima kali… it’s not like that… it reminds me of many things/stories/real life experiences… also, a TV drama series “di bawah ketiak isteri”… tau dak siri tu? TV 3 kot, eh 9? Eh, 7? Entah tak ingat… tapi adalah kat TV… for God sake, I didn’t follow that series (saya hanya menonton chanel org tua2 no555, harap maklum)… but, happened to accidently watch it when I was visiting a relative… lagipun, kerap iklan dia…

OK, I don’t really know the main theme of the drama, so I’m making an assumption here, it must be some sort of lame vulgar idea of a wife = queen control / abusive wife… people, have u noticed? kalau tengok tv kat Malaysia tu, segala macam drama cerita (drama Indonesia termasuk sbb banyak sangat kat Malaysia)… a story of a wife who abuses her husband (normally does not appear as the main theme) is becoming the norm in the society… setengah tu, bini dia sampai boleh tarik telinga dan si suami tu terhengeh2 terheret masuk dalam rumah… lepas tu, kadang boleh tempik laki sampai dengar satu taman… kadang buli laki jadi meja, buh gelas ayaq atas belakang… laki kena suruh denda lompat katak… dan macam-macam lagi…

People, what are these…???!!!

Haish.. this is going to be an essay…

My real life encounter… laki sepak terajang bini, banyak lah kes… bukanlah org terdekat… nanti spekulasi pula… tp adalah pernah dgr/jmpa…

Isteri queen control? Hahaa… ada, bukan tak ada… (ada org ckp cerewet tu bibit queen control, really?) tapikan… saya menyokong seperkaralah, QC is not for Queen Control.. but for Quality (Quantity?) Control instead…heee…

Anyways… there are many ungrateful people out there, and some of them happen to be wives… As the post mention regarding the hadith and all… Memang pun… Kadang org perempuan ni bila bercakap…

Contoh;

“sejak kita menikah 23 tahun, abang tak pernah bawak chek jalan-jalan…”
“sejak kita kawen 10 tahun, abang tak pernah beli baju selai pun kat chek…”
“sejak kita pindah mai sini, abang tak pernah kot nak tanya chek sihat ka dak…”
“sejak kita bukak nursery, abang tak pernah bagi bunga ros kat chek…”

Well, I would say that… these are merely women's figure of speech… but what are in those?

1. Lies
2. Ungratefulness
 (too much to elaborate... boleh nampak kot?)

So, I try to imagine what are some of the answers could be… heee…

“Takkan la menikah 23 tahun tak pernah pi jalan-jalan… yang kita ronda kat pasar malam tu apa?”
“Takkan kahwin 10 tahun, tak bagi baju sehelai pun… yang sepersalinan masa kahwin tu bukan abang beli?”
“Buat apa lagi abang nak tanya kalau hati abang dah boleh rasa chek sihat ka dak, lagipun sejak kita pindah, chek dah makin bulat…”
“Amboih, melampau… nursery lagi abg bagi minta bunga ros apa lagi?”

So… be it merely a meaningless speech… a wife should never says such…yes, we women always complain about many things especially to men… I think that’s because we see things differently from them and we expect them to understand… but I suppose, Allah created us, men and women… not to be like each other… but to complete each other… that’s why we are different in many ways… I’m not married, very  inexperienced in this matter… but from my observations (growing up among the adults is a great advantage…hehe)… a profound understanding between both is fundamental…and what creates the understanding?...it’s far beyond talking and listening…it’s the art of acceptance…

OK, back to the matter of the abusive wife. Yes, they exist… somewhere… but it’s not a norm…

1. Cerita tu, dahlah digambarkan dalam masyarakat melayu… beragama islam selalunya… mana perginya rasa hormat yg dituntut agama?
2. I would say, such story/scene of abusive wife has downgraded us as women… it’s a humiliation upon us who suppose to be gentle and respectful towards husband.
3. Ramai sangat dahka lelaki dayus zaman sekarang boleh biaq bini jadi macam tu?
4. It has tainted the image of marriage… such holy institution has turned into a joke…

People… marriage is a beautiful thing… that’s why it is promoted by the syariah… of course, there is sweetness and bitterness… there is gives and takes… but it never makes a man pathetic and a woman abusive or vice-versa…

Do you remember how Dennis the Menace had changed the behavior of children when the series first appeared in1959? Many children of that time strangely became naughty by imitating Dennis… Well, I’m not saying that many women will eventually turn into monstrous-super-abusive wives (most married women are adults, takda la senang sangat nak meniru,kan?) due to watching “di bawah ketiak isteri”… the point here is… these days, media shapes the world… since we don’t have much control on what comes from the west… at least, all that comes from us… let it be substantial and morally constructive… boleh dak?

I shall go to sleep… besok nak p inspect rumah… send me your duaa, so that I could get an accommodation before the school commences… thanks…

Friday, February 12, 2010

Buh-bye home!

I’m leaving for Melbourne very soon. It is hard to lift this heaviness of my heart. Through many years that had passed by, I still don’t deal with separation very well. It is a great sorrow for me to part with my love ones. Still go I must.

Anyways, whatever or however I feel usually is temporary. I’ll be okay once I resume to my hectic student life. I do miss it somehow… Being idle for too long isn’t good. As I reflect on my summer holiday, I did nothing much except, hanging wallpaper, reading and nannying. But I surely did a lot of thinking… Even about things that I never even thought of thinking…

As usual, prior to my leave, I would have a final shopping which usually is a series of mall tour that occurs for a few consecutive days… hehe… OK, due to that I’ve been going to the malls these few days, there are many promotions for two upcoming events, Chinese New Year and Valentine. Waaa.. it adds to my dreadfulness that I have to leave on Chinese New Year. Nak raya jugak!

However, what is this Valentine Day? Well, I don’t find any need for me to answer that… I’ve been hearing speculations and rejections of that very day since forever. Read this fatwa for further knowledge. There is a clear-cut that it is Haram, not my opinion… but our scholars’.

So my dear fellows and friends, it is never our culture to begin with… and there is no need for a special day to show our love towards our love ones… Love is an everyday thing. When you love, it shows…

Two more years to get to a real start… For many reasons, I wish these two years will fly fast. Ameen.

Monday, February 8, 2010

Sentimental

Langit petang dan burung terbang pulang sarang... Matahari garang dan suara-suara girang... Pohon nyiur tunjang dan tanah lembab separa padang... Katil bujang dan radio usang... Wajah-wajah yang ku sayang... Sekala lagi, selamat tinggal itu bertandang... Resam anak dagang harus terbang...

Mana hati tidak sarat pabila harus diheret jauh dari damai nikmat nian... Kata org tua, alah bisa, tegal biasa... sungguh bagai dikata, namun apabila alahnya tentang berpisah... berkali sudah, hati tidak pernah biasa... Menatap redup wajah berkasih sang ibu, memaut rapat naungan cinta sang ayah... Mana hati tidak merasa payah... Tawa jenaka kekanda-kekanda yang tidak pernah reda... pasti merantai rindu, sarat terbelenggu....

Namun, untuk sebuah janji pada pertiwi... segenggam cita untuk hari muka... dan sejunjung kurnia dari yang Esa... Kan ku heret jua jasad dan jiwa... Untuk kesekian kalinya... tempat ini harus ku tinggalkan lagi...

Tersurat sudah perjalanan ini... lalu harus terus menerokai... lewat setiap langkah, mengharap adanya indah kesudahan menanti... kesudahan yang tak pasti sungguh harapan tidak pernah mati... bersilih ganti manusia menemani, ada yg menjadi kenalan, ada yang menjadi teman, ada yang menjadi intan... yang datang bersilih pulang, yang pergi kembalinya jarang... cuma, moga ada yang terpaut sayang, tidak pula menjadi hilang...

Bukan mudah menimbang rasa, antara pertiwi dan sanubari... Pada bintang jauh dan awan langit tujuh, sehembus rahsia disemadi... Moga pabila siraman hujan melalui... Tercurah penuh misteri hasrat itu ke bumi lalu butir hujan menyentuh hati yang mengerti...

Sekali lagi... aku harus pergi... cuma kali ini, biarlah putar masa itu lebih bererti kerana harap semakin sudah ku semi dan seraut hari esok sudah terintai oleh mata hati...

Sungguh, ku serahkan pada Ilahi... siapa dapat menduga, esoknya aku masih di bumi...

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Yummy!

Second post for today… haha.. pulun….
But this time around, I seriously have a thing to share….

Weeee~…. I had just discovered how to enjoy McFlurry in style… yeah, I know… perhaps, it’s nothing to be proud of… but who cares… muahahaa… (kak sarah mesti tension)

I don’t know how long I haven’t had McFlurry…and this evening, due to the extreme heat… it appeared to be the most delightful treat…so I had one, shared with my dearest Kak Sarah… but the moment I grabbed the cup, I noticed that it has quite a unique spoon… (I know, it’s been like that since it first appeared in the market, tp nak buat perak juga!)

I wonder why the spoon was designed to have a fat hollow squared handle… Was it meant for easy grip? Or was it just purely aesthetic?

Anyway… unconsciously(?) I slotted my index finger into the hollow handle… the spoon hence appeared like an extension of my finger… hahaa… and I continued eating the ice cream… Oh! It tasted better! Heee… Org jari besar tak boleh buat… haha…


It’s just a cup of McFlurry, but different people enjoy it differently… (as it also depends on the size of your fingers…)

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Takdak idea tapi nak tulis gak!!!

1. Yay.. syukur dah ada mesin kerja baru...
2. Impian nak dslr simpan dlu la jauh-jauh... =(
3. Bila nak sudah pasang wallpaper ni... lembab ngokngek sungguh... ralit sgt... padan muka...
4. **sob**sob** return to Melb on 14th Feb, iA... waaa, tak sempat raya kat rumah...
5. "Inilah sandiwara dunia!" kata P.Ramlee
6. Cita-cita makin banyak... hati bernyanyi "harapan setinggi gunungggg..." (apatah tajuk lagu ni?)
7. OH, my siblings are growing old... mana saja pergi, org tny "tu ayah/mak ka?" Oh my,how it makes me feel so young young young..!!!. muahaha...
8. Rumah kat melb tak dak lagi... balik jadi homeless... hahaa..
9. Ada banyak buku teringin nak baca... "The Witch of Portobello" by Coelho seems interesting... Nak baca "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" pun tak terbaca lagi...haha...
10. 3 hari dah duk nyanyi " I beg your pardon......." hahaha...
11. Kak Sarah duk makan keropok... pastu kata "pukui 4 weh!"
12. Yala...yala... org siap!!!